Archive for April, 2009

Won’t you be my neighbor?

Posted in Funny with tags , , , , , , on April 29, 2009 by Garza

For the past several months, probably even more than a year now, there is a section of west Beaumont that is undergoing a major transformation.  There are developers in the process of building homes, shops, a theater, etc. in this certain section of the Westend.  There is a fence that surrounds the entire area and that fence is sprinkled with various advertisements for different area realtors and other interested parties.  There is this one real estate lady and every time I drove by her sign I knew she reminded me of someone.  Well I finally figured it out and I just about fell out of my chair when it hit me.  I know it isn’t nice to make fun of people but this is about as perfect as it gets when it comes to “celebrity” look-alikes.

Everyone remembers when the trolley would come whistling out of the wall on Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood and we would all be whisked away to the neighborhood of make-believe.  King Friday and all of his subjects like Daniel Striped Tiger, Henrietta Pussycat and X the Owl.  I remember Daniel Striped Tiger had been trained to not bite anyone and he only bit his food.  Anyway, there was also Lady Elaine Fairchilde and her lack of self confidence.  Lady Elaine was always a bit creepy to me.  She had those really red cheeks and that long red nose.  Something about her gave me the heeby jeebies if you will.  Well Lady Elaine brings me to my previous topic of the local real estate lady.  In my opinion they could be sisters.  What do you think?

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Again, I know it isn’t nice to make fun of people, but seriously the resemblance is uncanny!  And speaking of Mr. Rogers and look-alikes, what about Harry Connick Jr. and Mr. Rogers himself?

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Funny stuff.  By the way, what ever happened to You Cant Do That on Television?  Oooooooooh Alisdair?  And…”Ready, aaaiiiim…Wait!…Stop the execution…” (the firing squad)  That was a funny show. Oh well, I don’t know.  (I just got slimed.)

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Baby Isabella

Posted in Family on April 22, 2009 by Garza

Well this is just a quick update to keep all of our friends informed of the progress with the pregnancy.  We went to the doctor yesterday to have an ultrasound in order to confirm that the baby was head down, healthy, there was enough amniotic fluid, etc.  The doctor found that everything is progressing fine and that the baby is healthy.  According to the doctor and the ultrasound with two weeks left for full term the baby is already 8 pounds!  He said we could expect, if she carries her to term, a 9 + pounder!  So it looks like we are going to have a big one.  Kathy, can I get that website for those special order diapers?

Anyway, everything is going well and Lana is feeling fine under the circumstances.  She and I are already having trouble sleeping.  She is just uncomfortable with an extra 35 pounds on her abdomen to lug around and I wake up every time she moves to ask her if she is okay.  I can hardly wait!

We have an appointment next Monday and the doctor said that that is when he will decide if he needs to induce or set up a time to induce or perform a Caesarean.  We will definitely keep everyone updated.

Look out world, there is another Garza on the way!

I’m a racist!

Posted in Politics with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 17, 2009 by Garza

…Because I support the recent tax tea parties.

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I really don’t know what to say here.  I mean some people can play the race card at some pretty interesting and creative times.  How in the HELL can Garafalo be serious here.  Instead of bashing her, which would be the Limbaugh way of handling this situation, I will educate her and maybe some folks who might agree with her.

First, I guess I should reiterate that I am in support of this new tax tea party movement.  It is about time that the masses started to realize that the government was screwing us out of hard earned money and we weren’t receiving anything in return.  Which leads me into my next point.  I do know what the Boston Tea Party was all about so let me give everyone a little bit of history.

The Boston Tea party had ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with racism!  The only part of the original tea party that could be considered racist was the fact that some of the citizens in Boston Harbor that day were reportedly disguised as Native Americans.  I believe honestly that this was probably an attempt to shift blame in the event that there was a backlash or an outcry or investigation of the individuals involved with illegally throwing cases of tea into the harbor.

The original Boston Tea Party was ALL about the colonists revolting against the notion of taxation without representation.  The whole uproar began when the Parliament in England passed legislation in 1721 that made it illegal for any British colonies to import tea from anywhere other than Great Britain, where the British East India Company had a monopoly on the tea market.

In the beginning the East India Tea Company was only allowed to sell tea in Great Britain and the tea that went to the colonies was usually illegally purchased Dutch tea that was  smuggled into the region at a much cheaper price.   Not to mention that even in Great Britain Dutch tea was more popular because it was much cheaper.  The amount of taxes attached to the EIC tea were too high and the non-taxed Dutch alternative was too cheap to overlook.  The East India Company was losing significant revenues from theses actions and the British Parliament finally allowed EIC to import into the colonies.

When EIC was selling tea primarily in Great Britain they were receiving a 25% ad valorem tax or Value Added Tax (which the Brits still use today.)  Parliament attempted to help EIC regain some of their ground in the tea business and lowered taxes on tea and gave the company a refund of the 25% tax.  Of course this move meant that the government was going to start losing revenues so they passed the Townshend Revenue Act of 1767.  The Townshend Act placed a duty on the tea that was shipped to the colonies and the duty was the primary source for the income of certain British Lords and other elected official.  The only intention of the tax was to raise revenues for the British government.  There was no intention to use the revenues to build bridges or schools, but simply to pay the wages of elected officials.  Essentially the Parliament was effectively taxing the colonies even thought the British Constitution prohibited them from taxing the people without consent from their elected officials and since the colonies had no elected officials in Parliament, the tax was unconstitutional.

Eventually the Parliament waived the Townshend duty in Great Britain, due to uproar by the hometown folks,  but held on to the duty applied to tea sold to the colonies as a way to retain their right to tax the Americans.  The Parliament was trying to maintain their control over the Americans plain and simple.  (Much like the Government is trying to maintain their control over us all.)  Thus, the Americans were victims of taxation without representation and their tax dollars were going to a government and institutions that were not directly beneficial to them.  Hence, the recent tea parties protesting the sending of tax dollars to companies without the consent of the people and with no benefit to us all.  The government is spending us into a hole and people are finally starting to speak out.

How is it racist in anyway to be pissed off that the government is sending the money that we broke our backs to earn, to companies that in return will probably still file for bankruptcy, still spend 1.5 million remodeling a bathroom, still give 165 million to executives that oversaw the decline of their companies, still spend millions flying private jets and having huge week long Super Bowl Parties, and in no way benefit us as citizens etc. etc.?  In fact the very act of the government spending money it doesn’t have and printing trillions more to make up the difference will DEFINITELY hurt us all in the long run!  Can you say hyperinflation and the demise of the dollar?

Soooooo the ONLY logical explanation for Garafalo’s angle is the fact that she thinks ONLY white people are mad because it is ONLY white people who make money that can be taxed.  So she must be  insinuating that black people and other minorities don’t have jobs and don’t earn income and thus don’t pay taxes.  And of course everyone knows that is purely ridiculous, so the irony is that it is HER words and comments that are in fact racist and not at all the people who she lambastes with such blind conjecture.  Wow.  Unbelievable.

Am I the only person that feels this way?

…and the fear of the day is…

Posted in Politics with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 15, 2009 by Garza

12345Well isn’t this just typical fear mongering from the government.  You know every few years or so the government has to devise some new person, or country, or thing such as terrorism in order to keep the citizenry in fear so that we can look to them for strength and protection.  It really has been an ingenious tool that has kept the public in check for decades.  Think about it, first it was the Germans and the Japanese in the 30’s and 40’s.  Then it was the Koreans in the 50’s that threatened our way of life here in the U.S.  We also had the Vietnamese that we had to worry about in the 60’s because their communist ways could have ruined the freedoms that we enjoyed here, then came the apex of the Cold War during the 70’s and 80’s.  When the Cold War went away we had to worry about AIDS and HIV during the 90’s.  When AIDS and HIV went away, we had to worry about terrorism and Al Qaeda.  Oh and don’t forget about Osama Bin Laden, or as I like to refer to him, Tyler Durden.  So now that the government has sufficiently been able to scare the people into thinking that the country faces a constant threat from every corner and person in the world, the cycle continues.  So now that terrorism has started to get played out and people are sort of immune to the talk of terrorism the Dept. of Homeland Security has devised a new fear in order to justify its unnecessary existence.

Are you ready for this?  The new fear of the day is…duh duh duuuuuuuuuhhhhhh…RIGHT WING EXTREMISM!  Okay folks, just like we rounded up the Japanese during WWII, and we yelled racial epithets at the Vietnamese, and we hailed the metaphorical victory over the Soviets with Rocky 4, and we showed prejudice and ignorance towards the homosexual and minority communities for spreading “the AIDS”, and we decided to shoot up corner stores across the country because of the “ragheads” that were running them might be in Al Qaeda, now we should all go out and round up any conservative or republican or anyone who speaks out against the president because of their terroristic tendencies.  Are they for real up there in D.C.?  I mean how many fictitious threats can they manufacture before the citizens of this country realize that one, the government first and foremost rules by FEAR, and two the Dept. of Homeland Security is and always has been a monumental waste of taxpayer money?

Well I guess this means I am probably on some kind of terrorist watch list by now.  If anyone in the government has happened to see my blog then I guess I am considered a right wing extremist.  Does he speak out against the government?  Check.  Does he speak out against the “nation’s first black president?”  Check. (Even though he is the nation’s first bi-racial president!  It is funny how we never here about his evil white side of the family.)  Does he dislike the IRS?  Check.  Does he own and like guns?  Check.  Does he enjoy killing animals even if it is only for food?  Check.  Does he waste too much time watching the government and complaining to anyone who will listen?   Check.  Does he believe in states’ rights?  Check.  Does he believe that the federal government is corrupt and too big?  Check.  Even though he is Hispanic, does he think that illegal immigration is a problem?  Check.  Does he believe the Supreme Court, ehum Ginsberg, should rely on the U.S. Constitution and ONLY the U.S. Constitution?  Check.

Well, I guess he is a right wing extremist and a person the government needs to be wary of.  What a load of crap!

So let me clear the air, now that I am probably being monitored:

I, Christopher Garza, do in fact believe in the aforementioned ideas, but I do not believe in violent or anarchist methods in order to accomplish my goals.  I strongly believe that with enough education the citizenry if this great republic of ours can rise up and make a difference in the way this country operates and is governed.  I believe with enough education, the population can elect the right people for the job, and hopefully those individuals can resist temptation and stay honest and true to their campaign promises without sacrificing personal liberties and the constitution.  (It is possible, and it can be done.  See Ron Paul from the 14th district of Texas.)

I believe that in some small way by my constant complaining and criticism on this blog of the government and their methods, I am at least helping a handful of people at least start to ask questions and not just believe everything the cable “news” outlets tell them.  I have hope that there are still enough like me out there to change the course of the country and re-institute the constitutional, sovereign, strong but caring, great republic that we once knew.

So to the Dept. of Homeland Security, et. al., there is nothing to see here, move along.

PS for a good laugh, here is the full article:  ridiculousness

And here is the link for the actual report in PDF format.

This kid speaks speaks a foreign language!

Posted in Funny with tags , , , , , on April 8, 2009 by Garza

If my daughter is this cute, I don’t know what I’m going to do!

Just rambling

Posted in Uncategorized on April 7, 2009 by Garza

So I was cleaning up some stuff that had made the move from the apartment to the new house and I found some old binders and notebooks.  Most of my friends know that I am pretty damn obsessive compulsive and rather anal about things.  Since my first semester of college I have kept all of my school work in binders by semester.  Each binder represents a separate semester of college and graduate school.  Each binder is in order of class taken and each folder within the binder is in date order.  I know I know, I’m pretty ridiculous, but I can’t help it.  Aaaaaaanyway, I found some old notebooks and papers that were loose and I was looking through them to try and figure out which binder they belonged in and I found some old creative writing papers.  So I figured I would share some of that stuff with you all.    So here is an entry I made in my creative writing journal for Dr. Sanderson in Spring of 2001:

I felt a chill in my skin as each drop fell and slid down my pale scalp. The artificial air made the rain almost crystallize and glisten on my face and arms, and the cold rush was almost overwhelming. I was conscious of the fact that I smelled like a young boy that was summoned inside by his mother after a long afternoon of playing football in the street. I swept the beads of water from my forehead and flung my fingers violently towards the floor. My toes were losing their grip inside of my shoes, and my untied laces whipped at my ankles vigorously like little wet tongues. The saturated cuffs of my khakis were sticking uncomfortably to the back of my legs, and the monotonous melody of wet rubber against linoleum began to fade as I made my way down the fluorescent corridor.

The smell of wet paint and new particle board curled around inside my nostrils. The hallway was long and boring but was sprinkled with a few of those Home Depot, mass produced water colored flower pictures mounted in fancy gold frames. I always ignored them and focused all of my attention on beating the crown moulding to the end of the hallway; another characteristic of my annoying obsessive compulsive disorder.

The doughnut delivery boy was soliciting his usual selection of stale apple fritters and LDL causing jelly doughnuts. Oddly, I felt like a powdered doughnut might help to calm my nerves, so I stopped and turned on a dime. I noticed the hole above the Pegasus wing on his Led Zeppelin shirt as I called out to him with a sense of urgent dependency. Then I rescued the crisp dollar bill from the grasp of my leather wallet, and the exchange was made. I took comfort in the soft fuzz of sugar filled heaven as I thanked him and made an about face.

As I continued to reluctantly put one foot in front of the other, I indulged in my sweet weakness. I momentarily felt peace as the powder from the doughnut covered my teeth like little sweaters; and then my overpriced gourmet coffee ripped them off and floated them away.

The tension in my chest and my neck began to tighten as I approached the door. The door was sleek and cold and ominously framed by jet black painted steel. The gelid chrome knob numbed my senses and the hinges groaned a taunting laughter as I slowly pulled the door open. The air inside was damp and heavy and there he sat…

Let us clear the air

Posted in Politics with tags , , , , , , , , , , on April 2, 2009 by Garza

Of course most of you who read this blog are my friends and I am sure, at least I hope, that most of you saw through the BS of that last post.  Most of you know me better than that, and I want to assure you that that was an attempt at an April fools day joke.  Mom, I am glad that I at least was able to scare you for a moment.  I am surprised that I didn’t at least get a few more comments than what I did, but maybe everyone was just too smart.  Oh well, I would like to say that at least I enjoyed playing around for a day, but that post was very hard to write even if I was just joking.  It took my fingers a long time to actually type the words that my brain was telling them to type.  Even they were sayin, “what in the hell is he doing?  Does he know what he is saying?  Ahhhh!”

So yes, everything in that last post was BS, bah scratch that, very big mounds of BS.  So maybe I worried you for a second and maybe I didn’t, at least I tried.  So please, if I did happen to influence you to cross over to the dark side, please, PLEASE go back and read my previous posts and refresh yourself on why King Obama and all of his hair brained ideas are NOT what this country needs.  With that being said, I urge everyone to visit some of the websites on the right over there, go out and buy assault rifles before they are banned or before they get even more expensive, go out and buy ammo before it gets too expensive, go outside and hunt and fish – it’s fun, and by all means read Ron Paul’s Revolution: A Manifesto!

Oh yeah, and if you do want to join a group called PETA, make sure the acronym stands for the People for the Excellent Taste of Animals.   Now excuse my while I heat up the grille.  =)